Can't breathe.

I have so many thoughts running wild in my head I can't even focus on anything. What the hell is going on!!!!!!!!!!!

1. I like you, I like you a lot, I miss you, You send me sparatic messages and I am having trouble decifering anything. I want to just tell you what I feel, get some answers, so that I can at least breathe again. But then I don't want to because I don't want to put myself out there.

2. I don't care what anyone says - YOU made YOUR bed now YOU lie IN it. It's not my responsibility to tell you you're fucking up and you shouldn't be with her. It's not my responsibility to make sure that you keep your happiness in check. Don't make me feel like it's my job to fix your life. Yes, I know you want to be with me and if I would tell you I would, I know that would give you the balls to leave her. You aren't happy with her. In fact, you are miserable. But I don't have feelings for you. Does that mean that I am ultimately responsible for your misery because YOU won't stand up for your fucking self unless you have someone there to replace her with? NO. Grow up. Be happy. It's not my fucking job to take care of you, Asshole.

3. I wish my best friend would stop being so perfect, stop telling me all the perfect things. We can't be together - it's not right, it doesn't make sense, it's not the future in store for us - so STOP, please I am begging you, STOP being so perfect that I start confusing my feelings for you with comfort. BE the best friend that I love you for, but PLEASE STOP trying to be the right guy for me.

Alright, well that was a bit off my chest - I feel sufficiently better. Thank you.